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A LIFE-AND-DEATH JOURNEY
“He should realize that we are engaged upon a life-and-death errand.” Alcoholics Anonymous, page 75
“Death had its hands around my throat; the terrors of the grave overtook me. I saw only trouble and sorrow.” Psalm 116:3
For what it’s worth: Suicide on an installment plan, one drink at a time, used to be the direction of my miserable alcoholic existence. Every day was a day in my death. Now each day is a day in my life. I dreaded life and feared death. Now I enjoy life and look forward to eternal joy. I had nothing to do with this miracle. It was a free gift of God’s grace. My daily responsibility is treating my disease. It has the power to kill miracles. If I take that first drink of alcohol today, only the grave could end my “trouble and sorrow”. Today death will not have “its hands around my throat”. I am praying, getting to a meeting of Alcoholics Anonymous, and trying my best to stay close to my Heavenly Father. He and I are working together to maintain my daily reprieve as we walk together on this life and death journey.
FROM MISERY TO MERCY
“It is clear that we made our own misery. God didn't do it.” Alcoholics Anonymous, page 133
“Praise the Lord! For He has heard my cry for mercy.” Psalm 28:6
For what it’s worth: My insane conviction that God was responsible for my alcoholic agony not only kept me drunk for years, it was the most difficult obstacle I had to overcome in recovery. God did not do it, I did. Accepting responsibility for my plight and developing courage to change were gigantic miracles in my life. Without them, I would have died a lonely, miserable drunk, probably in the gutters of Baltimore with the cockroaches crawling all over my stinking body. Instead, here I am enjoying sobriety and life. One thing is certain, I was carried from alcoholic misery to His loving mercy not by the grace of Joe but the Grace of God.
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